Home > Amnesty, Mumford, Secret Policeman's Ball > US to ‘intervene’ in UK following Mumfords atrocity?

US to ‘intervene’ in UK following Mumfords atrocity?

It had been a quite and peaceful day in New York and then tragedy struck. During a so called ‘benefit gig’ for Amnesty International, suspected terrorists unleashed the ‘Mumford’, a form of dirty bomb that can devastate entire audiences with one faux folky wail.

Following strenuous negotiations with the US Home Dept, deployment of the ‘Coldplay’ had been agreed to as long as sufficient warning was given and audience members were allowed to leave early in order to avoid it. The ‘Mumford’, however, was a completely unexpected turn of events and left hundreds of lives in ruins.

A spokesperson for the US Defense Dept said that “high level talks” had commenced in order to find a solution to “this uncalled for act of aggression”. Among the proposals it is thought that US forces may be mobilised in an attempt to enforce regime change in the UK music industry. There have already been unconfirmed sightings of US submarines in the Thames Estuary.

David Cameron refused to comment on the increasingly tense situation passing it on to his fag deputy, Nick Clegg, who said “Until Dave says something I really don’t know what to think”.

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